It depends whether we value the tired old ‘stories’ in our heads about men or whether we value bringing the kind of value to the table that men SEE as value for a long term relationship. So WHY are we really focusing on the silly story of ‘oh yeah well mem are just INTIMIDATED BY ME! Simply because we feel sad and hurt that we are alone.
It was that I walked around, living my life from this place of thinking that my worth came from being career minded and successful. And yet – it pushed the better men away, because I didn’t need their direction.
And that became a habit; so much so that when i spoke to men, my body was tight, I wasn’t trusting, I was fully set on directing my own life. I wasn’t soft, I was hard and trying to just be enough.
Instead, downplay your ideas as just “thinking out loud,” “throwing something out there,” or sharing something “dumb,” “random,” or “crazy.” Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don’t come across as too clear or direct.
Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
As Jada Pinkett says; ‘no woman wants a man other women don’t want’.
In other words, women go for the man with the most status they feel they can get.If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it.Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly.It doesn’t mean we AREN’T attractive; it just means that we didn’t show up that way in the eyes of men. ’ why not be more approachable then, if we really value relationship and connection and opening to a man? We just try to cover it up with stupid stories like: No. But we have to survive somehow; and to SURVIVE, we have to tell ourselves an internal story that makes us feel good enough that we can walk out the door in the morning and actually live our lives. Even if they are intimidated by you, that usually only counts for a small percentage of the reason why they are not wanting a relationship with you. How is men being intimidated by you even relevant to your love life?I hear women saying to me; ‘but, men are intimidated by beautiful women!! You can always wear a sloppy item of clothing and dull your attractiveness on the outside – but that wouldn’t change your inner radiance and would make you actually more approachable. What matters is whether men are attracted to you or not for a relationship.(Click here to take the quiz “How Feminine Am I Actually”)Achievements for appeal in a commitment relationships are for men; men compete with each other to achieve more and therefore gain more status.