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While there are a lot of gay dating sites for men seeking men out there, not all of them cater to those who are seriously searching for a lasting relationship. We believe that a long term relationship requires two people to really gel, which is why we prioritize an intelligent matchmaking process and create connections that we're confident can go the distance.
Douglas Haldeman, an internationally renowned expert on gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered (LGBT) issues. I am lucky to be a veteran of 40 years of living as an out gay man and a psychologist in the LGBT community.
Tell the truth about yourself (age, weight, SES, whatever) — you know that whomever you are interested in is going to find out the truth sooner or later.
Be up-front and you’ll feel better about your communications. Don’t despair: there is a market for everyone: So you think you are over the hill, and that no beautiful person will ever look at you again? It’s easy to worry about that (see above), but don’t allow yourself to go there It will not help you achieve anything, and will erode your self-esteem. Attend community groups where the participation of older LGBT people is valued; if you go out, visit bars/clubs/coffehouses that have mixed-age clientelte. There are good resources available for meeting people form all over the world who admire us older folk: Silverdaddies and Caffmoscommunity are a couple of reputable sites. MOST OF ALL, EMBRACE YOUR AGE: You are likely used to feeling that being over 40 is a deficit in our community.
If you are reading this, you may be an older gay, lesbian, trans or bisexual person — which in our community could be anyone over 40 — and looking for love.
Let me first say that if you are looking for a one-nighter, fair enough: many older queer folk are not interested in a long-term relationship (LTR), or even dating, for a number of reasons.
As a psychologist who has worked with LGBT people from all generational cohorts for thirty years, I have some ideas that may help you in your search: 1. Go to bars; if you don’t like them, or don’t enjoy alcohol-saturated environments, join community groups; volunteer for LGBT causes. Regardless of your age or ability status, everyone can find something active that they like to do.
Know what you want, and focus accordingly: These days, because of the Internet, it is much easier to connect with like-minded people in terms of dating. If you live in a rural area where these options are not available, use your computer to connect — or take a deep breath and try and start a club/interest group where you live. Focus on what is under your control, and leave the rest: Are there demons in your head, telling you that you’re too old/too fat/too washed-up to find a loving relationship? Be content with who you are and what you have, and it will be much easier feel good about yourself when you meet others — of any age. Be honest: You know by now that ours is a youth-obsessed community, and it is easy for older people to feel invisible or marginalized.
Whatever the reason, by this stage in life, you know where to find what you need: online hookup sites (Scruff, Grindr, Manhunt, Adam4Adam, Craiglist) or the more traditional in-person, impersonal venues.
If you are interested in dating, though, and the possibility of finding an LTR — either again, or for the first time — read on.
It couldn't be easier to start dating with us; simply register with our service, take our in-depth questionnaire and start building your personal profile - you'll be meeting like-minded gay singles in no time at all! Once you've completed our personality test, you'll then receive 3-7 partner matches daily.
In this way, we streamline the online dating experience so that you can focus on the people you're truly suited to and don't waste time and energy on dead-end connections.
In case you haven’t realized, your twenties kind of suck.